Ten Years Later, We Finally Ended Up Together

I met my person more than ten years ago. Nothing romantic actually happened between us back then. When I was in school he tutored me in math, and later I would run into him at parties sometimes. We were never really close, but for some reason I always had this belief that we would end up together one day.

It wasn’t something I talked about with people. It was just a quiet assumption I had. Like in the back of my mind I always thought, yeah, that’s probably who I’ll end up with.

Eventually we lost contact and years passed. When I discovered manifestation, I remember thinking maybe I should actually try to bring this into my life instead of just thinking about it.

Doing the techniques felt easy for me at first. I liked affirmations and scripting and imagining conversations with him. Since I already believed we would end up together, it didn’t feel forced. It actually felt kind of fun.

Then something happened that I thought was a huge sign. He made an Instagram account and added me.

This was surprising because he had never been into social media at all. When I saw the request I was really excited. I thought it meant things were starting to move.

Then I opened his profile. There were pictures of his wife and two kids.

I remember just staring at the screen trying to convince myself it didn’t matter. I told myself reality could rearrange and that this didn’t mean anything. But if I’m being honest, it hurt a lot.

I still messaged him to say hi. The conversation was normal. He seemed happy and his life looked pretty full. It didn’t reflect the connection I had imagined all those years in my head. I kept persisting for months anyway. I thought eventually things would change. Then one day he posted that they were expecting another baby.

I had spent years believing we would be together. I didn’t really date other people because I felt like he was my future. Suddenly I started thinking maybe I had wasted all that time believing something that wasn’t real.

That’s when I decided to get help. I started doing coaching calls and the first two sessions I cried the entire time. Like actually cried the entire call. It was embarrassing but Paulie didn’t make me feel silly about it. She had been through something similar before so she understood why it was so upsetting.

One of the main things that came up was that my end state didn’t actually feel natural to me.

When we talked about it more, I realized something that was uncomfortable to admit. I was living as someone who dreamed about love, but not as someone who actually had it.

That’s when I started doing emotional revision more seriously. I ended up getting the thirty day package because I knew I needed support to really change how I saw myself.

During that process I noticed something about my identity. I had always seen myself as the nice woman. The friendly one. The person people like having around. But not the woman who gets the big love story.

Seeing that was a bit humbling but it also made sense. If that’s how I saw myself, of course my reality would reflect that. Letting go of the old identity felt strange at first. Waiting for him had become part of how I thought about my life. When that started to change it honestly felt unfamiliar.

After doing the emotional revision work for a while It became easier to move into different states instead of spiraling.

The feeling of unconditional love that came up during that process is hard to explain. It was just so full. Like I didn’t feel desperate about anything anymore.

After the thirty days were over, Paulie gave me written instructions on how to go fully into the end state. For a while I just stayed in that peaceful feeling and enjoyed it. Later I started imagining the end again, but this time I focused more on who I was being rather than focusing on him. During this time I muted him on Instagram. I knew if I kept watching his life it would be harder to stay in my state.

Eventually I noticed something interesting. I felt a lot more detached. If things worked out with him, great. If they didn’t and someone else showed up instead, that was fine too.

Then he started messaging me again. At first it was just casual conversation. When I checked his profile all the pictures with his wife were still there which annoyed me a little, but I stayed focused on my state.

Over time the messages got more personal. Eventually he told me he was going through a hard situation because his wife had cheated and they were taking some time apart.

I remember feeling shocked that something like that was actually happening. Part of me was worried that it might take years again or that they would get back together, so I made a decision. I would keep talking to him but stay loyal to my end state. If my future came through someone else instead, I would accept that.

Around the same time men from my past started reaching out again. Old contacts, random messages. But I didn’t let that distract me from what I was doing.

Whenever something triggered me, I went back to emotional revision. I was pretty determined not to fall back into my old patterns.

After a while I started getting clearer glimpses of the end with him. I didn’t try to force it. It just started feeling normal. Not long after that he removed the pictures of him and his wife from Instagram. He kept the ones with his kids but the rest were gone.

We became closer and started to fall for each other in the 3d. He posted a picture of the two of us. After everything that happened it still felt a little surreal seeing that.

So in the end we did end up together, but I had to change how I saw myself first. The inner work ended up being the biggest part of it.