At 50, I Found God and Myself

My 50th birthday was coming up and I felt that life was passing me by. I went to therapy and it helped somewhat, but there was something missing, I wanted something deeper. I was missing a spark (no pun intended).

Paulie was very patient with me. She would explain things so clearly, and every time she talked about her relationship with God, I could literally feel the love pouring out of her.

I had a lot of skepticism and fear at first. I knew that she would make me face the uncomfortable feelings and take responsibility for my life. She did do that but was gentle about it.. I always thought the Bible was controlling and misogynistic. She welcomed all my questions and allowed me to explore.  I realized that I had been listening to other people’s opinions and that kept me running in the opposite direction of what I had been looking for my entire life. The Bible is actually a love letter from God to me and I’d never heard anyone talk about it like that before. This woman is truly changing lives.

I fell in love with God and with my own life. My body feels healed. I have energy. I can breathe. I laugh again. I reconnected with old friends I hadn’t seen in years, and they still wanted me in their lives. I feel like I have a purpose.

The other day, I went out for food, and I felt like I should ask a woman if I could sit with her. I just shared a little about myself. And she told me that something in our conversation completely flipped a switch for her. She said she had been seeing everything so bleak, and just being with me made her see things differently. That’s the sense of purpose I’m talking about. When I’m myself, I can actually make people’s day better.

Now, I’m ready for love again. I’m open. I’m excited to fall in love with a man and to love everything in my life. I’ll be sending  an email when it happens, telling you all about it. Thank you. You've done more for me than years of therapy ever could.